sunday

last week was nuts.  i applied so many places, and i had an interview, this one is for a firm in town.  the interview went well, but they low-balled me on salary.  i told them my number, so we'll see if they come back.

i also met with a divorce attorney, who was a real jackass.  no wonder people hate lawyers.  he knew i was a lawyer yet STILL tried to take advantage of me.  see ya later, jackass.

Eating has been all over the place.  One day is 200 calories, next is 1800.  i was dropping pretty well, but i have put a couple back on.  and i have not been working out besides teaching my classes.  i signed on to do a 77.7 mile relay in april, so i need to get back into running.

Lifetime is airing this series called "Starving Secrets" about people with eating disorders, Tracy Gold is trying to help them.  i would have been all over that show a few years ago, i was obsessed with anything and everything ED, anything i could use as a trigger.  now, i tried to watch it and i can't.  it just seemed so exploitative.  even though Tracy is known for having an ED, it just seemed so contrived.   She's not trying to help people, she's putting on a damn TV show.

don't need help with being triggered anyway.

sooo tired

this week has been such a roller coaster.  i'm sorry i haven't been updating.  i was interviewing for a job that if i got i was going to have to start Dec 19th - in Florida!!!  I was freaking out about having to move to FL in under 2 weeks.  Plus my H was kicking up his shit again.  i wish i didn't get so stressed out...i didn't sleep for three days because i was worrying so much, and when that happens i pretty much walk around constantly in tears, which makes me pretty useless.

but i didn't get the job, and i decided before i heard that if i did get it i would turn in down.  once i got to that point i was able to calm down a little, but just getting to decisions like that makes me lose my mind.

there's a judge in san diego that's interested for a job that starts in march...and i have an interview at a firm in town next week...those i could handle.

how easy to forget..

i was feeling very strange today, and i couldn't figure out why.  kinda sick, but not too bad, just weird.  then it occured to me...am i....hungry??  i couldn't recognize the feeling, lol.  that always happens, but i don't remember it happening this soon.

i'm going to start up the daily exercises again. 3 60 second planks a day.  zion, don't worry about doing this if you've got other stuff going on...i just finally feel up to trying them and testing my shoulder out.